I Decide To Join the Establishment

by craig on October 31, 2010 6:46 pm in Rendition

Somebody posted two parcel bombs. Grave threat to western civilisation. Our basic principles are at stake. They hate our freedoms. Biggest threat since World War 2. Islam incompatible with democracy. Yemen is the new Afghanistan. Eternal vigilance needed. More tanks required at airports. Fighter plane escort for passenger planes is a rational answer to parcel bombs. NATO may need to invade Somalia. Torture in Saudi Arabia vindicated by this tip off. Israel is our stoutest ally.

Will that do? Where do I get the money?

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  1. alan campbell

    31 Oct, 2010 - 6:56 pm

    Well, it’s a start.

  2. Sorry, yoiu forgot that little bit about yemen being a thorn in the eye of the beholder, The house of hypocrissy Saud.

    What is found in the mountains ofr yemen? more oil and gas? gold?

    Or the future of organised state terrorism, supporting the established noblesse noblige as we know it?

    If you have joined the establishment, you have to ditch the Lib Dems and join the hard core fraternity.

    They all know you, you know!

    israel seems to become the Lib Dems stoutest ally as well, jeremy Browne seems to have butt-plugged himself into Netanytahu’s personal ambiguity

    memory, releasing it as required by the great masters of the universe.

    Ah, gouly goings on eh, who would have known what Halloween is good for some thirty years back, today you can hide a horse behind it, almost anything will disappear if you smatter it with a bit of witch dust.

    One big whoosh from some ‘concerned witches’ and the BBC believes anythin’.

  3. Larry from St. Louis

    31 Oct, 2010 - 7:09 pm

    Heh Alan – btw Craig Murray likewise accused me of being a Secret Agent Man because I posted at – what the thought was – a curious time.

    He seems to operate on a Reverse Occam’s Razor basis.

    Sleeping disorder? No way.

    Job that requires availability in different time zones? No way.

    Secret Agent Man? Absolutely. After all, it’s the explanation that requires the MOST assumptions. Like, for instance, he’s so important that the intelligence systems of the world need to target him on his blog.

    Never-ending laughs here.

  4. Larry, you can tell us if you wanna be the boyfriend of a butch married German heterosexual man, no need to use the News of the world, or take pounds and shekels from some sordid outfit just because you wanna come out and like the CfI’s.

  5. technicolour

    31 Oct, 2010 - 7:18 pm

    You know, despite the evidence of the infiltration and surveillance of CAAT, among many, and the latest announcements on Indymedia UK, it would be far more pleasant to think that our public resources were being spent on combating corruption, say, or violence.

    But in fact I hope Larry and alan campbell are being paid. Otherwise, why aren’t their friends and families trying to help them?

  6. yeah Larry from ST L got confused with the paper that mentioned Thermite in the dust, he thought they mentioned Marmite?

    Hes been perplexed ever since

  7. Larry from St. Louis

    31 Oct, 2010 - 7:27 pm

    That thermite “paper” – are you once again bringing up that you don’t understand the concept of peer review?

  8. Larry from St. Louis

    31 Oct, 2010 - 7:28 pm

  9. technicolour

    31 Oct, 2010 - 7:28 pm

    …and he’s talking to himself again, that can’t be good.

  10. “Somebody posted two parcel bombs. Grave threat to western civilisation. ”

    What’s with everyone, about bombs on planes? It’s a damn sight more hazardous crossing the road than taking a scheduled flight anywhere outside of Africa. Every year forty thousand Americans die for the automobile industy and practically no one gives it a thought.

    Let’s have some realism. The odd planeload lost to a lunatic with an explosive jock strap is simply the price we must be prepared to pay if everyone is to get on with their business. Even, with that risk, flying’s much safer now than in the early days of jet airliners when Comets were discovered to disintegrate spontaneously in midair and Boeing 707s routinely dropped engines in mid-Atlantic.

    And air travel in those days must have been a Hell of a lot safer than traveling by stage coach in the days of Dick Turpin and James Whitney:


  11. Anon – Ask LfStL why the price of Marmite has gone through the roof. He will say that we will say it’s the Jooos who have cornered the market.


    Nice picture of Thatcher here, toasted!

  12. technicolour

    31 Oct, 2010 - 7:49 pm

    Craig, larry & alan aside, I’m with you. Two and two is twenty-two.

  13. Biggest threat since 5,000 BC, when the first brickie in Sumer laid down the first brick.

    The Strategy of Tension strike again!

  14. KingofWelshNoir

    31 Oct, 2010 - 8:07 pm

    More to the point Craig, you’ve still got plenty of contacts inside the establishment, what do they think of all this? Surely they know as well as anyone on this blog that this latest terror hysteria is pure garbage?

  15. In my opinion, from the information available to me, it seems likely that the blogger in question would benefit from a prolonged period of assessment and treatment undertaken by a multidisciplinary mental health team.

    He expresses aggressive impulses directed against individuals and exhibits some degree of paranoid ideation, as well as possible elements of thought and body image disorder. There appears to be some measure of temporal disorientation. There are as yet no first-rank symptoms of schizophrenia. But that would exclude neither the presence of a loculated psychosis, nor second-person auditory hallucinations.

    However, the blogger in question poses no danger to others. Indeed, he is largely ineffectual, his Tourette-like ejaculations, inefficient and overburdened, it seems, with the repetitive structures common in the early onset of organic brain disease in those with already- compromised cerebration.

    Rx: Regular, three-weekly depot injections of depixol and the assignment of a Community Psychiatric Nurse, a Social Worker and a Nurse Practitioner specialising in Continence issues.

  16. alan campbell

    31 Oct, 2010 - 8:33 pm


    You’ve already done your years as part of the Establishment. No doubt well paid for it too. If you’d really wanted to rock the boat, you could have done a Robin Cook in March 2003, but you didn’t. Maybe you’re more Clare Short?

    PS I met her once. Deeply unpleasant when drunk.

  17. technicolour

    31 Oct, 2010 - 8:47 pm

    ah hah, he’s going for the organ grinder

    spec she didn’t like you much either, alan campbell, drunk or sober, but probably couldn’t be arsed to post ad hominem slurs about you on a forum. still, you carry on. makes you look big :)

  18. technicolour

    31 Oct, 2010 - 8:48 pm

    ad feminem?

  19. Feminem: Eminem in drag?


  20. alan campbell

    31 Oct, 2010 - 9:00 pm


    Excellent. Good one.

  21. Dick the Prick

    31 Oct, 2010 - 9:13 pm

    I’m gonna join the Rastafarians so at least i’d know which fake war I was fighting. ‘Pass the reefer, dude’ -‘yeah man’. Either that or the women’s institute – quality cakes and jams at very reasonable prices too.

    Taxi, pour moi?

  22. OT – litre of Bailey’s at Morrisons only a £10nner! Huzzah.

  23. 10/10, tech and Suyahl. Alan’s opening comment made me laugh too!

  24. Nice retort Stupid from St Louise.

    Please, please enlighten me with your greatness and in one act of permanent enlightenment please read the paper and explain in your own words on why the science is errrrrrr false….

    Im waiting eminent scientist to here your explanation line by line, unless of course your gonna just point me to the popular mechanics response.

    Next your gonna tell me Office Terrance Yeakley comitted suicide (Oklahoma Bombing)

  25. Jack Straw has an article on Terrism around at the Guardian.

    Comments enabled


  26. @ Alfred,

    Your point is accurate and well stated:-

    “What’s with everyone, about bombs on planes? It’s a damn sight more hazardous crossing the road than taking a scheduled flight anywhere outside of Africa. Every year forty thousand Americans die for the automobile industy and practically no one gives it a thought.”

  27. I feel sorry for Hanan al-Samawi, an engineering student at Sana’a University, had been arrested along with her 45-year-old mother, who was later released.

    Ali Abdullah Saleh, Yemen’s president, said the information that identified her was provided by the US and the United Arab Emirates.

  28. Few people in the public sphere seem to have escaped the (rather amusing, to me) hysteria around this half-baked plot. Thank you, Craig, for being once again the voice of reason in the middle of a never-ending cacophony.

  29. Hullo Craig,

    Remember the Maine! Or more to the point, do you remember the Maine? How about the ‘surprise’ at Pearl Harbour? How about the cock-and-bull Gulf of Tonkin? Not forgetting of course the USS Liberty, the Lavon affair, and of course, those WMD’s in, um… which Muslim country was slated for destruction that week? It was one of them.

    The thing is they were all fake mate. As fake as a whore’s orgasm. But somehow you keep going back to that whore. You won’t let anyone tell you that the establishment (elected, spooky, or both) are sluts who wouldn’t know how to be real if they’re lives depended on it.

    And yeah, you perpetually point out the ordinary sex and the bad manners in bed etc. but deep down you still hold to the position that when they say they care about you, they mean it.

    Face up to it Craig. It’s ALL false. All of it, from the tiny squeals all the way through to the window rattling screaming.

    The shoe bomber, the underpant bomber, the liquid bombs, all fake, and obviously and comedically so. I could go on and on, and in this avalanche of bullshit there you’ll be with your face upturned waiting for a tasty morsel, and waiting, and waiting, before finally turning to us and wondering if it doesn’t taste ‘a bit faecally’.

    Wake up Craig. The whore doesn’t love you. That shit taste in your mouth really is shit. And this terror? Fucking hell! More of the same! Sure, of course – always this way.

    You’re like some arse-about Peter Pan mate. The most naive, hard-bitten, wide-eyed old hand there is, perpetually ready to take the spooks at face value until of course you realise, “D’oh! they’ve made it all up! Again! Why do I keep falling for the same old trick?”

    It’s a good question. Why do you?

  30. Nobody – Craig’s piece is ironic.


    …Al Quaeda gunmen suspected….. wait for a ‘revelation’ that the AQAP (Al Quaeda from the Arabian Peninsula) branch from YEMEN were involved.

    A very dodgy story indeed.

  31. I have an idea too.

    It appears that al Qaeda is Arabic for ‘the Base’ – or database as, for its Western incarnation, it morphed to refer to the database of foreign (mainly Wahhabi and Sunni Arab) fighters prepared to harass the Russians in Afghanistan. Arabic, like English and most languages, has its collections of homonyms and it appears that “Toilet” (loo, khazi, WC, gents, john etc etc.) is a particularly populous one – especially since they have to cater for our disgusting Western habit of sitting on a seat rather than squatting.

    And guess what? “al-Qaeda” is one of them – and the disgusting Western one at that.

    So question: can you imagine a group of terrorists styling themselves “The Red Toilet Faction”, “The Toilet Brigades”, “The Irish Republican Toilet” – Hmmm. IOW yet another inept Western invention to replace the now defunct “communist” and keep the masses scared docile and demanding of protection.

    I watched Frank Gardner on BBC News last night and it was hilarious – really entertaining. The toilet was invoked with solemn-faced gravity no less than 9 times in a 3 minute slot with such gems as: “The toilet in Yemen consists mainly of toilet operatives from Saudi Arabia” – and there was I thinking that it was Saudi that imported lowly immigrants to clean their khazis – you live and learn eh?

    So next time you are forced to endure Frank Gardner or any other other MI5/6 stooge waxing on about al Qaeda in Iraq, Afghanistan, Saudi, Yemen, Blackburn, Sadlers Wells, etc etc. remember, everywhere has them; and every time you hear that dreaded scary “AL-QAEDA!!!” word, just substitute the translation. You’ll begin to look forward to the news as a reliable source of hilarity.

    PS native Arabic speakers are cordially invited to correct me – or elaborate.

  32. Barry from St. Boswells

    1 Nov, 2010 - 12:13 pm

    Unanswered questions in the Yemen terror scare


  33. ‘Replica watches’, indeed!

    If you look on the most recent Assange thread, you will see that the generator of fake spam directed at this site has revealed their existence.

    So, SISsubcontractspammyboy – go get a life – or we’ll set the lawnmower man on you!

  34. Somebody,

    May I roll my eyes at the obviousness of that? How about the ‘irony’ of you telling me I missed the point precisely whilst missing my point?

    Shall I lay it out for you? The point I was trying to make was that it took Craig three posts to decide that this was bullshit. And in amongst this irony he employed to do so, he idiotically declares that the shoe bomber and underpant bomber were real. They weren’t.

    Craig’s perpetual position is that Muslim terrorism is real and occasionally the security services fake the odd thing or two. He’s got it arse about. Muslim terror is 99.99% fake. I will admit that once in a blue moon the odd unprompted Muslim buys the fiction as reality and acts out the part. But such ‘real’ terrorists are as rare as hen’s teeth.

    There is no al qaeda. Not beyond the CIA’s database and their long-dead employee figurehead Tim Osman, or as we all know him Osama Bin Laden. Their number three, Azzam al Riki, is actually a Jewish boy from Orange County by the name of Adam Pearlman. Otherwise go google “Oded Yinon A Strategy for Israel in the Nineteen Eighties” and see the battle plan all laid out and merely waiting for the al qaeda bogeyman to be waved over the battlements to get the action rolling.

    Craig’s been told all of this many, many times, and long before you arrived here. And yet, here he is still perpetually wide-eyed.

    Do you get it now? Craig’s odd ‘ironic’ piece pointing out this errant tree and that errant tree is impressive until you realise that it’s not this tree/that tree, it’s the whole fucking forest and Craig just refuses to call it.

    Ha! Here’s an analogy – let’s re-imagine MacBeth albeit with the approach of Birnam Wood as our doom rather than MacBeth’s. Indeed it’s MacBeth who’s screaming loudest at how we’re all fucked. And Craig? He’s on the battlements pointing out individually dodgy trees but perpetually insisting that Birnam Wood really is marching up to Dunsinane.

    And so! Between our king of the fascist roll-out, MacBeth, and his doubter-in-chief, Craig, how great is the distance between them? A metre or a mile? Do you get it Somebody?

  35. technicolour

    2 Nov, 2010 - 10:47 pm

    Yes, Nobody, I thought I saw a resemblance to Apostate, in one of your more scatalogical posts, but that last one would be quite a stretch. What does the wood stand for, exactly?

  36. Groan,

    If Macbeth is king of the fascist rollout and the wood is our doom and we’re in a discussion of fake Muslim terror then what would Birnam Wood be? Muslims of course. But then again, it depends on which Birnam Wood we’re talking about.

    If you recall, in Macbeth, the actual Birnam Wood didn’t actually advance upon Dunsinane at all. Okay, there you have the truth of real Muslims. The ‘Birnam Wood’ that did advance upon Dunsinane was no such thing. It was mere fakery – Malcolm’s army holding branches to camouflage themselves. Here Malcolm’s Army = Intelligence services. There you have the truth of the intelligence services – the fakers of Muslim terror.

    Craig’s position is that, yes, this is the case, the West does fake Muslim terror but, (back to the analogy now) says he, Birnam Wood really is advancing upon Dunsinane.

    I understand that people here are happy that Craig calls bullshit on the odd thing or two but then we’re back in the original ‘forest for the trees’ analogy. Yeah well, three cheers for the single-tree-theory aficionados. Long may your focus remain very very narrow.

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