I Get Discouraged 38


I apologise for not blogging more last week. I had an extremely full itinerary in Turkey, and was a guest in the kind hands of others. It would therefore have been difficult to blog regularly, but with determination I could have managed it. The truth is that the rude and unpleasant withdrawal of my invitation to the New Statesman event on whistleblowing really knocked the stuffing out of me. I get severe periods of self-doubt. Maybe, they are right, and I am rubbish. Am I just a wannabe member of political society, sadly and futilely hunched over a laptop? I feel I have much to contribute, but no means to contribute. Why do I do this?

Anyway, for light relief I wrote a piece on kilts for the Independent on Sunday. While not inherently noble, entertainment is no bad thing, and it cheered me up to write it. I am though feeling slightly guilty it has knocked a really excellent article by Johann Hari on Libya off the top of their “Most read in comment” chart.


38 thoughts on “I Get Discouraged

  • kathz

    No, you are not rubbish. Your contributions matter. And writing a blog isn't a bad way to contribute.

    You can't change the world single-handed, however acute your insights – but you are communicating with other people whose ideas also matter. You have already made more of an impact than many people – and should continue to do so. The New Statesman event wasn't as important as all that – and sounds as though it was extremely disorganised. You reach more people through your blog than fit into a town hall (where most of the attendees will already have fixed opinions anyway).

    I liked the kilt article.

    Keep writing, thinking, communicating.

    • Sibel Edmonds

      I tremendously respect Mr. Murray. He has integrity among other respect-worthy attributes. It is the mainstream media that has credebility issue/problem; not him. I have dealt with similar blows (MSM Blows)- one more negative point for them. We'd be honored to have him on our BFP Podcast show and or as contributor.

      Sibel Edmonds http://boilingfrogspost.com

      • YugoStiglitz

        Sibel,

        Why are you posting here? Is this another chance for you to beg for money?

        I don't think you quite get that you're a great deal of the problem in Craig Murray's desperate attempts at getting attention. Perhaps he has something meaningful to say in the mainstream media, but idiots like you glomming onto him are the problem, and not the solution.

        You went on the Alex Jones program to say that 911 was an inside job. Do you not understand that that necessarily makes you a nutcase right-wing American moonbat? You have no reason to think that 911 was an inside job – that even goes beyond the fantasies you concocted as a former low-level federal employee.

        I know that you were on the cover of the "American Conservative" magazine – I'm sure you think that makes you important – but that just shows that there are a lot of people on the American right who are willing to listen to fraudulent claims.

        I'm just curious – why do you lie with every chance you get to lie? Why did you lie about the CIA's connection to bin Laden? Why did you lie about that Chicago Tribune article, in which nothing much was said?

        Craig Murray has previously referred to you 911 kooks as "nutters"! He didn't hold back. You're a nutter to him. Why do you think he'd have anything to do with you?

        You were clearly a low-level employee at one point, and you decided to tell lies to make some cash on the side. On your website – every fourth post looks like a desperate plea for non-taxed cash.

        And you're a right-wing nut. Desperately attempting to appeal to left-wing nuts in Britain.

        Get help, Sibel.

  • Guest

    "I get severe periods of self-doubt"

    Sometimes Craig you can be a real pain!!!, its not you that should have any "self-doubt", it is those who do evil things that should have the "self-doubt". Get your mind back onto the track of being a human being with a purpose in life, something those who do these evil things forgot about many years ago. One day of your life is worth something, more then can be said of so many.

  • John

    Don't let the B's get you down – your insights and analysis are invaluable to your followers and if they weren't having an impact why would they harass you?
    Keep going – you are A HERO TO MANY.
    J

  • Guest

    "Whatever you do may seem insignificant, but it is most important that you do it”

    Mahatma Gandhi.

  • willyrobinson

    "Am I just a wannabe member of political society, sadly and futilely hunched over a laptop?"

    I'd see you more as a journalist now, with some pretty handy scoops, a good writing style, insider experience and solid gold connections. A bit of depression doesn't change that – If you cant blog for a while then your loyal readers will simply wait 'til you're ready again.

  • David Grace

    Illegitimi non carborundum, as my mother used to say, although it is rotten Latin. I get discouraged that most of the country seems to have no interest whatsoever in the voting system, including most of my local Lib Dems who are far more concerned about keeping their own council seats. Your blog is an inexhaustible (I hope) source of knowledge and insight. We need you. P.S. Come to my birthday party !

  • Chrestomathy

    I agree with willyrobinson. For me your blog is the brightest spot in the blogosphere and provides insights not readily available elsewhere. Keep going.

  • CheebaCow

    Craig your post immediately reminded me of the Bertrand Russell quote:
    "One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision"

    I would wear your political exile as a badge of honour. If you were some political hack you could make a nice living as a talking head or else still be in the FCO. It's precisely because you are dangerous to the powers that be that they feel the need to try and ignore you. BTW the 'vices' that you refer to in your books and blog have always made me think even more highly of you. Your imperfections make your achievements and sacrifice all the more impressive.

  • deep green puddock

    Your contribution is important Don't give way to doubt. It is difficult. I think we are in a critical time of history and it is important that your testimony is heard.

  • Jonangus Mackay

    Just checking. Did you receive my messages about the Frontline/NS fiasco? Two of them I posted on the Frontline Facebook page on Friday, in the hope of shaming an explanation, if not a climb-down, from Vaughan Smith or one of the others responsible for what appears, on the face of it, a shameful episode ~ one quite contrary to the commitment of Frontline's membership, at least, to the principle of honest disclosure. This matter should not be allowed to drop. I urge all readers to go to the Facebook page in question & apply pressure. A fair chance sufficient kerfuffle will nudge the issue into Private Eye or one of the diary columns. If the FCO or Bell-Pottinger were at all involved, it's still important his be made public.

    I note that comments posted by others on Friday now appear, Craig, but not mine. I'm a keen supporter, have both your excellent & important books, recommend the blog at every opportunity & I'm not a nutter. Was already scratching my head. Now more so.

      • Jonangus Mackay

        Hmm. Strange indeed. Sent first a comment & then 2 or 3 private emails ~ time seemed of the essence, if pressure was to have any hope of success before Sat evening. Shall repost, below, the missing comments. Hope I don't sniff a stray Cheltenham rat.

    • Clark

      I submitted a comment on the New Satesman page. I suggested that they reinstate Craig to the panel, and maybe invite Charles Crawford or Jack Straw to oppose him, to keep the panel balanced. My comment was not approved by the moderators.

      • Jon

        Ha, I definitely smell a rat on that non-moderation! But quite expected of the NS these days. Tis a shame, I was rather hoping they'd make Pilger editor or something 😉

  • AlexT

    Maybe another point of view would be that you actually scare the establishment, and THAT is the reason you are black listed ?!

  • mark_golding

    well said, Cheebacow – this board is of course the 'brightest spot in the blogosphere' and times really ARE dangerous as people slowly waking up to the deceptions of the West – the US and UK governments who have profited from two world wars. We MUST be able in ourselves to dispel the myths of the last century – the myth that politicians serve us, the myth of the money/debt financial system, the myth of supporting the rebels in Libya while people are being TORTURED and murdered in Bahrain by Saudi forces AT THE REQUEST OF 'Secretary for WAR' Robert Gates, the myth of improving the National Health System while private enterprise 'cherry picks' the lucrative services as British doctors struggle with administration instead of saving and improving lives, the myth of cutting the deficit by destroying the social system that benefits the poor, disabled and elderly, the myth of a continuing 'war on terror' and associated 'black ops' by 'patsies' known and controlled by heads of intelligence community who are serving the 1% elite behind our political power structure, the myth that our generosity really does help the poorest in Africa and elsewhere.

    These myths are being prised out from the shadows by Craig, whistle-blowers and others including the emerging new media and PressTV. It is time to be strong, resilient, as, with purpose of mind we move forward as we must. We are part of an emergent process and cannot be dogmatic about any point of knowledge gained from challenging the social paralysis that exists today. We all must fight hard to redirect the resources and technical know-how used to destroy our planet – and people – into a better way, symbiotic to natural laws. We must be able to stand tall and apply unconditional love to life in our system, to protect its integrity and our own. Go forward my friends – it is your duty to lead.

  • Jonangus Mackay

    The missing comment referred to above:

    What an oozing irony: that the organisers of the Statesman/Frontline whistle-blowing debate should by their craven behaviour render themselves so richly deserving of some insider with sufficient sense of justice to pop up & blow the whistle on them.

    Brother Julian's understandably twitchy paranoia antennae tend, in my limited experience, to be tuned as often as not in the wrong direction: witness, for example, his most unfortunate choice of host(ess) for the infamous Swedish jaunt, & his bizarre involvement with the preposterous & pseudonymous Israel Shamir. And now, it would appear, this dubious promotional stunt.

    Can any hack worthy of the label journalist doubt for a moment that whistle-blowers are a good thing to be encouraged at every opportunity? Why bother dishing out annual awards for so-called scoops? Is this really a matter of serious journalistic debate?

    The owner of the Frontline Club is in origin a military man. I'd be astonished if Vaughan Smith did not early on receive, at the very least, an invitation to a spot of lunch at the Travellers Club, over which he would have been reminded, in so many words, where the loyalties of any former Grenadier Guards officer appropriately lie. Had such a chat not occurred, Her Majesty's Spookocracy would have been failing in their perceived duty to the tax-payer ~ quite aside from missing a bargain basement opportunity to display willing at least before fuming Langley friends & associates.

    I urge anyone with a Kensington Town Hall ticket to get in there with the first obvious question from the floor: Who vetoed Murray & why?

  • Jonangus Mackay

    Possibly in response to my question (Where is the whistleblower?) three hours later Frontline posted the following its Facebook page: ‘We are pleased to announce whistleblowers Annie Machon & Paul Moore will be participating in tomorrow's special debate.’

    My reply:

    ‘Craig Murray was likewise, I gather, invited to 'participate' from the floor ~ after the earlier request from Frontline's Ryan Gallagher ('Joining you on stage will be . . .') had been withdrawn mysteriously. This feeble last-minute announcement serves merely to draw further attention to apparent hypocrisy. A number of us are still scratching our heads. Who exactly vetoed Murray & why? One or two suggest it may have been the FCO. Was it? Answers, please, rather than earplugs. Dunno about the NS, whose motives, on recent showing, I wouldn't trust an inch. Some of us expect better from Frontline, however. Is it not committed to honest disclosure? The club's reputation is, I suggest, at stake. Many thanks, in anticipation.’

    And still no explanation whatever. Seriously folks: If you’ve not, for eminently sensible reasons, dipped a toe in the Facebook ocean, now is the moment to do so: http://www.facebook.com/FrontlineClub

  • Johnny Whicky-Leakes

    I hereby nominate the New Statesman for the Alan Rusbridger Medal that is only awarded to five star twenty four carat two faced fucking cunts.

  • somebody

    Well said everybody who has written in support. The NS have given the debate a lot of coverage. It was an odd thought as I read through it and the name Murray jumped out (referring to the neocon supoorter Douglas) that maybe the nitwit who invited Craig had got the wrong Murrray, or am I being naive?

  • glenn_uk

    A bit of genuine introspection now and then, and particularly the courage to do so publicly, says a lot about a person. If only the likes of Blair had the courage, or Bush the wit, to do so. I can't speak for the effect you have on humanity at large, Craig, but I can speak for myself – you are an inspiration and an education on human rights and how government operates. Just on one evening, for example, you made that packed hall in Swansea more aware of the state of the world and our role in it, than in maybe 10 years of merely watching the news. You made it obvious that the truth doesn't get spoon-fed to us, we have been shielded from it, lied to, and that there is an ugliness at the heart of our own establishment that enables even worse elsewhere.

    Time is precious, there are many blogs and sites around. Yet I always have time for this one, because your opinion actually counts for something. The great Mike Malloy spoke about things you had been saying a few months back, and stressed the importance of who it was that had been saying it: "I'm just a 'somebody' – a radio talk show host and activist. You, dear listener, the chances are with no disrespect that you're just a 'somebody' too. But former Ambassador Craig Murray is telling us this – and he isn't just a 'somebody'!"

  • Michael.K

    Criticism is allowed… but within the boundaries of what's "safe." What this means is that one isn't supposed to stray too far from the straight and narrow establishment concensus, Craig has over-stepped on numerous occasions, not least when he publically defined Zionism as "bullshit." This alone is enough to get one black-balled.

    Craig's two most charming qualities are his honesty and idealism, both of which are close to the kiss of death in public life. We live in an increasingly dishonest age, perhaps all empires enter this phase near the end, when the ruling elite desparately cling to their myths as facing up to reality is simply way too painful.

    Gaining access to the media in order to contribute, or make a difference, becomes increasingly difficult as dissent is slowly curtailed, and alternatives are seen as a threat to the "sensisble" "mature" and "realistic" approach to the challenges we face.

  • Chater

    Craig, you are not alone in feeling self-doubt. It is a natural human reaction, an attempt, however desperate, to make sense of a world where good sense has, like your diplomatic career, been shafted, dismissed, sidelined, marginalized. Take heart in the fact that for centuries slavery was considered normal, but attempts to ban it were eventually successful. Dito the universal suffrage.

  • ingo

    Craig, you have changed all our lives to a certain extent, although Yugo would never admit to it, as he would get punished for doing so. Your eloquence, honesty and truth could only have left you in the principled corner, there is no other place for you and it is good.
    It is very frustrating to go against the grain of hypocrisy at all times, but you of a people who speak up when others need a lead. I regard you as a multi skilled journalist/ writer and harbinger of truth and you blog as essential reading, before any of the news soruces I frequent, I value you as a friend and fellow fighter.
    If you would have an annual party at you new abode, the garden would be full of supporters, even if it would be a charitable paid for event, because people hol;d you in the highest esteem.

    • ingo

      We all have learned to live with your actualities and sporadic breaks, thats fine, it does not diminish the quality of your work.
      The frontline club clearly has lost its credibility and I would expect serious journalisst to leave over this ' parcour stage management '. They have a lot to answer for and are infiltrated with the worst kind so it seems, good riddance, lets hiope private eye does pick this up and then drops it from great hight.

      Thank you for enriching my life forever.

  • carl

    Craig, you were right to feel mistreated by the New Statesman, humiliated even. But those feelings will pass and your raising of the issue has shamed them into some public backtracking. Meanwhile the NS has its own problems.

    Shunned by senior Labour politicians for much of the last 20-30 years (I don't remember Blair ever giving it a single proper interview during all the thirteen years he was Leader and Prime Minister, though I stand to be corrected on that – Brown similarly refused to go near it and Miliband is continuing that tradition), it is desparate for access to the major players and will do absolutely anything to get it. That makes it easy meat for the likes of Clegg and Balls and any other senior (though not quite top) people looking to keep the left of centre pacified.

    You are going to see more contortions by the NS as time goes on, more compromises, more betrayals of its journalistic values in order to get access to the major players. All you have to do is report them.

  • Saffa

    Craig, I'm glad you are doing what you do. There are too few people in this world who are prepared to stand up against the status quo. It is important that people get to hear the other side of the story. I have great respect for you, and I hope you carry on, because a lot of people like me would be worse off if you didn't.

  • Jon

    I'm late to the party here, but want to add my own comments to all of the above. I get bouts of frustration and doubt too, and wonder what all the worrying about the state of the world is for, the writing to MPs, soap-boxing to people who can't be made to care for the world, going on demonstrations, and the occasional leafletting of a town centre. But all these trivial worries are nought in comparison to the real, genuine sacrifices you've made, Craig. You could resign now as "professional troublemaker" and still feel like you made a decent dent in the world, but you still keep on going.

    So, well done. Here's to the next fifty years of professional troublemaking!

Comments are closed.