Jack Straw Plans More Criminal Treating 53

Having been caught red-handed indulging in the crime of treating – supplying free food and drink to voters to influence their vote – Jack Straw is planning to do it again this evening.

Treating is a criminal offence for which the maximum sentence is a year in prison. As a corrupt electoral practice, it also carries disbarment for life from both the House of Commons and House of Lords.

Straw has already flagrantly broken this law in an election rally at Jan’s Conference Centre on 25 April. Several hundred Blackburn Muslims were given free meals at a vote Jack Straw rally.


Blackburn police have told me this morning that they now have dealt with this by merely issuing a formal warning to Jack Straw’s election agent not to do it again. That is completely insufficient when Straw did exactly the same thing, at the same venue, with the same main speakers and the same food, five years ago, and was then given an official warning not to do it again.


It is beyond argument that nobody but a New Labour minister in a rotten borough like Blackburn would be able blatantly and repeatedly to flaunt the law of the land in this way without any consequences. I am now putting in a formal complaint to the IPCC about Blackburn Police.

Straw is however frantic as it looks increasingly unlikely he will hold his seat. A Gujerati constituent of Straw explained to me this morning that, in their culture, if they eat your food they are morally obliged to vote for you. He jokingly compared it to “tasting the salt” in the days of the Raj. A large gathering of Gujerati voters has therefore been organised by New Labour for this evening, at Lord Adam “Postman” Patel’s factory on Randall Street, where Straw will address the assembled diners. The plan is that, by issuing invitations by word of mouth through the Gujerati community, and holding the meeting on private premises with food provided by Lord Patel, they can get round the treating laws.

In fact this does not wash at all. The treating law says the candidate’s campaign may not “directly or indirectly” provide food and drink, while Lord Postman Patel, a New Labour enforcer ennobled for his creative approach to the organisation of postal votes, can scarcely claim not to be part of the campaign. He was on the stage making “vote Jack Straw” speeches in the treating spectaculars at Jan’s Conference Centre both last week and in 2005.

I have so far 16 volunteers from inside the Gujerati community who will infiltrate the event and let me know if treating has taken place, and gather evidence. This is interesting, because my friend who told me that eating the meal more or less obliges you to support the candidate, tells me also that it would be a great scandal and lose votes for Straw to invite all these people for a meal, and then just give the speeches instead.

Why is Straw so frantic? My mole tells me that New Labour’s canvass returns for Audley Ward show Straw in third place. This is normally his second strongest ward.

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53 thoughts on “Jack Straw Plans More Criminal Treating

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  • Jack Straw

    I am above the4 law little man!

    I can feed as many people for votes as they do in Pakistan!

  • Arsalan

    You will get no where by showing that it is illegal.

    Jack Straw is the one who tells the Police and courts who to prosecute and for what.

    Jack Straw is the judiciary, so how are you planning to get him to prosecute himself?

    You best bet is to try and find out where the food came from, in the hope that it will be Harram.

    I believe it is very likely to be Harram, because I don’t believe the type of people he has purchasing food are the types who would take Islamic dietary law or any law of God or man seriously.

  • anno

    The photos of Brown that appeared in the media after his bigot comment, seemed to me to be a morph of Brown’s face and Straw’s. Straw’s rat features adding smugness to Brown’s toad.

    The problem with the Tories and New Labour is not in their own idiosyncratic vices, such as asset stripping and gravy-training, but in their refusal to reverse the Thatcher plan to run this country on Usury instead of sweat.

    I am looking out of my back window onto two gardens, mine with rhubarb, spinach, apples trees coriander, potatoes and thirty other plants and my neighbour’s, who is in his eighties, who put down sodium chlorate last year because he couldn’t do the work any more.

    Usury is the same as the poison Sodium Chlorate. After you apply it, you can’t take benefit from the soil for many years. All you can do is put down concrete slabs to stop the weeds.

    Give me a party that will throw out Usury as a scheme for running the economy and which ceases finally raining down bombs on the world’s Muslims who have the right ideas, and I will give you a UK with a future.

    Jack Straw lobbying/treating his Muslim constituents is no worse than New Labour eating from the hand of the Israeli lobby in parliament. Jack Straw is taking from the Usury bankers and giving to the Muslims.

    Who’s buying is also selling. Muslims who participate in treating know full well the Islamic law on Usury, no taking and no giving. Receiving is the same as Paying.

    Similarly, eating Jack Straw’s food is the same as Jack Straw eating food from the Israeli lobby. Any Muslim who participates in this type of politics has strayed well outside the boundary of Islam.

    I hope the moles didn’t eat the poison while they were sat there.

  • Mark Golding - Children of Iraq

    My blood boils at unfair game. We learn GMTV will interview Nick Glegg in an attempt to explain why one should vote LibDem. This is on Tuesday night and on Wednesday night, the day before the General Election, they will interview David Cameron to explain why the Conservatives deserve power.

    Subtle timing and subtle differences biased towards the Tories – Bad show.

    Perhaps GMTV have forgotten the £2 million fine over its four year period of misconduct in viewer competitions imposed by media regulator Ofcom?

  • Suhayl Saadi

    !ScouseBilly is back! Lo! Truly, The broad, dark wings of the Daily Telegraph are upon us!

    ‘Jack Straw’, are you Arsalan?

    Arsalan/ Jack Straw, perhaps you might consider helping ScouseBilly with some technical information on how to make a good fish dish, so that such valuable and succulent information could be spread among the rightwingers of this wondrous land. The way to a Tory’s brain is through his stomach, as the gels do say say on Sloan Square.

  • Ruth

    ‘It seems to me that the only way you’ll see Jack Straw slung out is if the voters do it.’

    Well if he’s acting illegally treating his constituents, he’ll no doubt arrange for the votes to be manipulated.

  • Abe Rene


    Just curious, but don’t the gels on Sloan Square get their ille-gels to cook their fish for them, rather than risk breaking their nails? If so, you could get them to vote Lib Dem saying ‘The other Parties would deport your gels and then no more fishy parties for you, however fishy the Parties might be’.


    I understand that there was something fishy about the way postal or proxy votes were treated, but that Nulab wanted it that way because the fishiness favoured them.

  • ScouseBilly


    Thank you for your concern 😉

    However, I can knock up a pretty good bouillabaisse and last week cooked pulpo a la gallega fot the first time.

    And fyi I may inhabit a DT blog from time to time but I am certainly no Tory – yuk, the thought of it….

  • Richard Robinson

    “the best fishes often sing, roll on The Mersey,”

    I read that as “the best fishes often sing rock and roll on the Mersey”. Ringo Starrfish ?

  • Mark Golding - Children of Iraq

    It’s Friday lunch-time and after a couple of Trammy’s and a handful of Solpadol my headache is now a dullness, my thoughts confused and my heart is missing beats.

    The Tories have won, but have only 302 seats. Some Tory activists are cursing Francis Maude for not keeping a low profile and that ghastly women who had shreiked at Greg Barker for serious house flipping after he had cast his vote.

    I struggle to comprehend and focus on the financial woes drifting out of Threadneedle street. I make out that stirling and gilts are being sold to the floor – a stern looking David Black tells us the pound will be de-valued by morning and guilt yields are on the launch pad.

    We learn that Brown had successfully hidden the truth about our deficit, we have been borrowing £700 MILLION A DAY. Jack Straw has already told Brown he must quit after the results put Labour third in their worst performance since the second World War.

    My mind is so foggy I am wondering if all this is a dream.

  • John Seal

    “That is completely insufficient when Straw did exactly the same thing, at the same venue, with the same main speakers and the same food, five years ago,”

    Good Lord, the same food?!? Someone call Health and Safety!

  • Owen Lee Hugh-Mann

    Sickening to see Brown using a teenage girl’s tears for his campaign today as she broke down describing the slave wages her family has to live on, (working at the Treasury of all places!). He shamelessly took the opportunity to get all worked up and indignant about poverty and the minimum wage. So while MPs grow fat fiddling at the taxpayers’ expense, it turns out Westminster is one of the worst employers for everyone else – especially the department he ran for a decade. He’s had 13 years to do something about this for Christ’s sake, and just like his tardy lip-service conversion to the principle of electoral reform, we are supposed to believe he actually gives a damn. Has he forgotten who got rid of the 10% tax band? Mr End-to-the-cycle-of-boom-and-bust is relying on mass amnesia to get relected. He also warned against putting your cross next to a question mark on polling day – voting for an uncertainty. But in a multiple choice question, you’re better off taking a chance on an uncertainty than choosing the answer which experience has taught you is definitely wrong.

    In the same news report, Clegg said we need to change Britain for good. He was referring to the electoral system at the time. I don’t know who came up with the LibDem slogan for this election, but “Change Britain for good!”, with it’s double entendre, would have been much better.

  • MJ

    If Straw is repeating the offence only a day or two after being given a formal warning by the police, it should’t be necessary to bring a private prosecution. They should throw the book at him.

  • Courtenay Barnett


    ” Why not begin a private prosecution?”

    Sure – why not?

    Further one could convene one’s own Commission of Inquiry with a panel of persons of high public repute and publish their findings.

    Why not?

  • tony_opmoc

    Some of our local Bees turned up tonight…

    Some from as far away as Poland

    But most within the typical Flying Distance of Your Average Bee

    Now you may not understand the detail of how some of our bees want to get deep within

    But One of Our Bees Has Got a Full Gig Down Her Local Pub

    You have absolutely No Idea How Difficult This is to Achieve

    Our Local Bee Has Already Played Across America

    But we have Exceedingly High Standards

    She didn’t Show all her Honey Tonight

    She is Saving It Up For a Blistering Full Gig

    She is 85 Years Old

    Minus around 60 Years or So

    I Reckon She Will Get Away With It…

    But it is Really Tough

    All The Old Farts Want To Hear All Right Now By Old Farts

    She is Going To Turn Up and Do All Her Own Stuff

    With Her Own Band

    Will Anyone Turn Up?

    Will The Pub Sell Enough Beer?

    It is All Free Entry Where We Live in England

    Do you have Similar Local Bees in California?

    She has Already Done LA

    Our Pubs in England Have All Standards

    Yes Some of them have karaoke nights

    Which if you want to sing in public is a great place to star

    Learning to sing Well is INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT

    And some of our English Pubs are more about Learning How to Play Musical Instruments…

    And So Where We Live in England

    When we have a Jam Night – which we do Regularly

    We have all Levels of Talents

    From Complete Beginners

    To The Complete Opposite Extreme

    But we always give the Most Encouragement To The Oldest Man or Woman Over The Age of 80

    Who Gets Up On Stage And Does It Again

    The second bunch of guys is not the under tens

    And they can do it too….

    No its the 12 year olds and the 13 year olds and the 14 year olds…

    We Realise that when they get to 15, our Daughters The Same Age

    Won’t Let Us Old Farts Go To Their Teenage Gigs

    And I can understand that – because I can remember when I was 15

    How Else Can We Encourage Our Young Talent To Develop Their Skills?

    Give Them a Place To Play

    Its Not Just Music

    Its Everything

    The Way Our Human Species Progresses Is To Provide Places and Spaces For Our Children

    To Play

    We Give Them The Freedom of PLAY

    You Will Be Amazed What Our Children Can Achieve

    If We Do Not Tell Them What To Do

    Let Them Find It Themselves – Because Then They Own It – It is Their Own Original Idea

    And Then Give Them All The Encouragement You Can

    That is Leadership


  • tony_opmoc

    I Will Re-inFORCE

    The Fact That Although I Completely Believe in Democracy

    I will Not Be Votong On Thursday

    I am sat somewhere near the bottom of The Fasict Liberty Scale

    That is Near Liberty

    And Way To The LEFT Of All The People Standing For Election Where I Live

    I will however be in Central London in Oxford Street later today


  • tony_opmoc

    Warrior On The Edge Of Time


    We went to their Wedding

    And although I had talked to Lemmy Before (who didn’t turn up)

    I hadn’t actually spoken to Dave Brock before and shaken his hand

    I spoke to Nik Turner and shook his hand much more recently

    These Guys are My Heroes

    They were always better Than PUnk Floyd


  • mary

    Well did you ever hear of such a thing happening before?!

    Postal vote fraud: 50 criminal inquiries nationwide amid fears bogus voters could swing election

    By Sam Greenhill and Tim Shipman

    Last updated at 2:02 AM on 4th May 2010

    Voter fraud could determine the outcome of the general election as evidence emerges of massive postal vote rigging.

    Police have launched 50 criminal inquiries nationwide amid widespread cases of electoral rolls being packed with ‘bogus’ voters.

    Officials report a flood of postal vote applications in marginal seats. With the outcome of the closest election in a generation hanging in the balance, a few thousand ‘stolen’ votes there could determine who wins the keys to Downing Street.

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/election/article-1271457/General-Election-2010-Postal-vote-fraud-amid-fears-bogus-voters-swing-election.html#ixzz0mwOLdTrr

    Also Balls and Hain are recommending tactical voting to keep the Cameroons out.

  • Craig

    Alfred –

    The Postman Patel blog – originally called Postman Patel and His Dog Jack – was in fact named after Lord Adam Patel and his postal vote scam by its originator, the grat Eddie, sadly no longer with us. He was my agent in Blackburn when I stood against Jack Straw,

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